A Few Thoughts on American Idol

Ok. Yes I kind of like American Idol. There are only a few reality shows that I can watch--by the way, do cooking shows count as reality TV shows? I would say no except for maybe Take Home Chef on TLC which I really like--American Idol, Extreme Makeover Home Edition, and I guess America's Best Dance Crew. By the way. if any of these shows were canceled I wouldn't care at all. However, if I had it my way I would only watch these shows DVR'd.

**Quick Side Note** You know that question in Fight Club, if you could fight anyone in the world who would it be? For a long time my answer was Ty from Extreme Makeover Home Edition. I have since revised. Even though I think he's a dufus, I think the show is amazing because it actually helps people. I watch it even though they always tug on the old heart strings and make it super super emotional on purpose. But I am willing to let that slide because they are helping. It's not often that a Reality TV Show actually helps people. Now my answer to that question above: Oprah Winfrey or Tyra Banks. I'm not sure which one.

My favorite part of AI is the first few weeks during auditions. I love watching Simon break people down. I love it when people come in there and they think they are all that and a bag of chips and Simon just crushes their dreams. It is exquisitely delightful to watch Simon pull the rug from underneath them. It is even better when they yell at the camera's afterwards and say" You haven't heard the last of me. I am going to be a star and make them sorry." (Sigh) I mean, does it get any funnier than that? Does this make me a bad person? Maybe. But I haven't heard from any of those people yet.

Anyway, I have a really hard time watching live TV, but it is even worse with all of those reality TV shows listed above and especially AI. I mean at least if I am watching Lost and I have to watch the commercials, I know when the show comes back on I am going to be entertained for at least 8-10 minutes. No such luck with AI. If i record the 2 hour show, I can watch it in 30 minutes. That's right. There is at least 90 minutes of filler. Let me list all the advantages of being able to watch AI pre-recorded.

1. You don't have to watch the 10 minute intro when they recap last week, and then they all sing some super gay song together whether that super gay song be live or a music video (Those are the worst.)
2. You don't have to watch the commercials
3. You don't have to watch the stupid intro for each contestant before they sing
4. If they really suck - Like Amanda this season (more on this later) or that country chick, or some dude who was a stripper, for dudes - you don't have to watch it. You can skip on ahead.
5. You don't have to watch Randy or Paula say anything. I guess I don't mind Randy so much, but Paula is atrocious. Her bumbling, incoherent nonsense drives me crazy. I am with Simon when he is giving her those looks. His answer to who would you most want to fight in the world would have to be: "Paula Abdul".
6. You can fast forward to Simon's critique. His is the only critique that matters.
7. You can fast forward through commercials
8. You don't have to watch the stupid things Ryan says after the performance
9. You don't have to watch the recap
**10. The award show: You can watch it in 30 seconds. That's right. 1 hour in 30 seconds. Don't get me wrong. The producers at AI are really really smart. They get all of you suckers to watch 1 hour of TV for 30 seconds. Genius! I don't even really watch the award show any more. I just ask Amanda who got kicked off.

So I watch quite a bit of the show. Most seasons I get bored around the last 4-5 weeks. I honestly don't really care who wins. I will never by an album made by any of the winners. I think I get bored because once it gets to week 3-4, the best singers are usually left. The real intrigue is how someone like Amanda could be in the top 11 singers. She is horrible. I get that she has the whole Janis Joplin thing, but have any of you ever listened to a whole Janis Joplin album? Of course not. And if you have it is the greatest hits album. And I bet that you don't even like the whole thing. At least Janis played the guitar and brought a few other things to the table. I mean, I love music from that era. I probably have 15 grateful dead albums. But the only songs by Janis Joplin that I remember are Me and Bobby McGee and Take a Little Piece of My Heart. I wouldn't want Janis to sing any other songs. Even if she were in her prime today, I wouldn't pay any money to see her in concert. So I find it intriguing that Amanda is still on the show. I guess I really only like to watch to see how terrible the bottom feeders are each week and to watch the silliness of how American Votes each week. Once there are legitimate singers left who are all actually talented, i tend not to care as much.

I would love to hear other people's views on the show. Please post a note!